And then there was one

Lonely, I'm so lonely, I have no body.... okay, that's a lie. But I am all alone. Except for my soon to be fetus that should be touching down in uterusland any day now. Ha! How's that for optimism? I am actually very confident. Like overly confident. Like I have already seen what is going to happen. And before any snide comments about me being psychoti.... psychic are made, I have dreamed in prophecy since I was a kid. No joke. Ask my Mommy. She was there for that. At least sometimes anywho. Once, while we were looking for a new house to rent, we pulled up to a two story house that I had seen before. I told my mom I had been there before and she said no, you haven't. I was like well, I have seen it before and proceeded to tell her where EVERYTHING was in the house. She was like, eh whatever, then we went inside. It was exactly as I had described it. She asked me where I had seen it and I told her I thought I had seen it in my dream. That was the first time my prophetic ass saw something pretty cool. Or at least the first that I remember. I am bored. And I don't want to work. I want to sit here and eff off and when I am asked why I didn't do anything, I will be like, Oh, I'm sorry, did you pay me??? Okay, so I am being a little on the bitchy dramatic side today. My hormones are apparently on the rampage again. Sometimes I just hate being around people. No, I'm not going to be more specific because it does me no good to tear someone down that doesn't even realize they have stepped on my toes- especially if they don't read this. And the least I can do is say how I feel to their faces. So I shall keep my bitching to myself. At least for now and until I am unable to keep it all inside. I have been listening to my mePod a lot and sleeping a lot. I have been exhausted, though. But sometimes the sleep and the mePod just make it easier for me to be on my best behavior. I have a lot more control over my mouth and my emotions now that I know what the cause is. I don't know why it would take knowing the cause to harness it, but it did. And I am sticking to my story, brah! I find myself taking a deep breath if someone ruffles my feathers and I feel like I am about to flip out. Sometimes it helps, sometimes not. I feel bad for the people on the other end of my hormones. Like my husband. Poor guy. He had no idea he married a bitch. He has been so patient and understanding. I probably would have already smothered myself with a pillow if I were in his shoes. But he hasn't. And he has had plenty of opportunity! So my hubby and his pops went to deliver a spa to a couple that lives like an hour and a half away. So by my calculations, I will still be sitting at this store an hour after we close. Yay me! (in case it went undetected, that was sarcasm) I'm thinking if I get high enough, I could stay here all damn night!! Uh, maybe not. 8 hours is more than enough a day. Well, I have things to see, people to do. I am off!

And Then There Was One

Lonely, I'm so lonely, I have no body.... okay, that's a lie. But I am all alone. Except for my soon to be fetus that should be touching down in uterusland any day now. Ha! How's that for optimism? I am actually very confident. Like overly confident. Like I have already seen what is going to happen. And before any snide comments about me being psychoti.... psychic are made, I have dreamed in prophecy since I was a kid. No joke. Ask my Mommy. She was there for that. At least sometimes anywho. Once, while we were looking for a new house to rent, we pulled up to a two story house that I had seen before. I told my mom I had been there before and she said no, you haven't. I was like well, I have seen it before and proceeded to tell her where EVERYTHING was in the house. She was like, eh whatever, then we went inside. It was exactly as I had described it. She asked me where I had seen it and I told her I thought I had seen it in my dream. That was the first time my prophetic ass saw something pretty cool. Or at least the first that I remember.

PCOS and me

So what I have read and understand about PCOS is that I am insulin resistant and should stay away from starches and sugars.... can you say high fat high protein diet? I about fell in the floor. My whole life I have stayed away from those categories simply because they do take so long to break down and if it isn't used it is stored. Well apparently my body needs me to eat things that take a long time to break down because otherwise the insulin would just turn into fat and be stored???? As you can tell, I am still very confused by all of this. Apparently weight loss with PCOS is a bitch! But, since my last doctor appointment on May 17th, I have lost 3 pounds. My body looks more curvy and womanly and my boobs have gotten bigger. Like a whole cup size bigger. I didn't think that was a side effect, but my hubby isn't complaining.
Doc Greene prescribed me Clomid. Basically when he came into the exam room he said you have a disorder called PCOS and you have 2 choices. Either you want to have kids or you do not want to have kids. If you don't want to have kids, we will put you on birth control which will force your body and hormones to do what they have refused to do. If you do want to have kids, we will put you on Clomid. I of course said I wanted to have kids. So I took my first cycle of Clomid- which is 5 pills taken one a day during your period to force ovulation. So once again, we wait. I have felt sicker than... I don't know what. But I have been pretty sick.
Anyone thinking they may try Clomid, be aware you are about to be on an emotional roller coaster that you would gladly sit out if you could. I was sad, I was mean, I was okay, I was happy, I was mad and then it started all over again. It has been horrible!! But, the way I am eating, this medication and exercise (yes, I AM exercising) should bring my hormone levels back to good.